Connie Page Five
How did your family react to your decision?
Right from the start they said, "But that's exactly what you want to do! Why are you hesitating so much?" It was important to me that my family supported me so positively. They also gave me strong support at the beginning, when I was a family assistant. I was finding things difficult and didn't feel so good at the time. I worked with various SOS families and experienced how a family assistant can either be integrated into the working relationship by the SOS mother, or not. I gathered both positive and negative experiences there.
What happened after Harksheide?
There were further talks in Munich and a psychological test, to define whether or not I could develop motherly feelings towards children who were not my own. I was advised to spend another year as a family assistant in Brandenburg. I found it was a good experience to be there during the setting-up of SOS Children's Village Brandenburg. The first SOS mother started there in August 1996 and I arrived in October. The training in Mörlbach began in September 1997. I am still thankful to our village director that she said to me, "Treat yourself to this year in Mörlbach. Nobody else will ever be able to give you a year like that again." It was a wonderful year and a fantastic experience.
What was so special about the training in Mörlbach?
The theoretical teaching was a useful refresher for me. What impressed me most, though, was how we lived together in such a small space. We organised ourselves for shopping, cooking and going to lessons, and learned to improvise. We were thirteen completely different women who had one common feature, and that was our feelings for children. I also found the seminars where we dealt with our own families very useful: "Why do I want to become an SOS mother, where are my roots, why do I react like this and not differently in certain situations?" To deal with your own life-history in detail and to find out how others did. It was an exchange that resulted in friendships being made. That's something you won't find on any state-run course, and that's why I hope that these aspects will remain a part of the SOS mother training in future.
Connie's Story:
Page 1
Page 2
Page 3
Page 4
Page 5
Page 6
Page 7
Page 8
Page 9
Page 10
All these mother's stories come from SOS Children's Village Hermann Gmeiner Academy. Copyright is reserved and no unauthorized use permitted. Use for non-commercial purposes may be requested. The interviews telling about the lives of some SOS Mothers form part of an interesting study on being a replacement Mother to children in need in SOS Children's communities worldwide.