Do Page Five

Experiences as an SOS Mother

Have you, as a person, changed since you've been in the SOS Children's Village?
When I lived in my village at home and taught, I only had to do a teacher's job. Here in the SOS Children's Village, however, I have to work with the children who live with me all day and every day. I had to change and learn new things, in order to be able to cope with the demands made on me. I also had to change my way of thinking entirely: how could I bring the children up to be useful and helpful citizens? When I was a teacher, I only had to fulfil the duties of a teacher but now I have to be a mother and a teacher at the same time. In addition to that, I have a double role in bringing up the children. I have to be both the mother and the father. When a young boy grows up with a father, he obeys his father. However, in my family there is no father so I have to try to talk to him like a father. They accept that. The boys listen to me and obey me when I'm in my father role. I try to explain to them that they are growing up in the SOS Children's Village, because they don't have any parents and that they have to try hard at school so that they can achieve the same as the other children.

Have you received any in-service training?
Generally I go to the monthly meetings where somebody holds a lecture on different topics and where we are given more training in bringing up children. Since early 2001 we have had an SOS Vocational Training Centre here in Hanoi. Last year they offered six courses and this year the SOS mothers from Hanoi will take part in a refresher course.

What has been your best experience since you've been in the SOS Children's Village and what has been the worst situation that you have had to deal with?
The best thing has been to have a big family and to feel the harmony within it. The most difficult thing for me was in the early years when all the children were of different ages and all came from different places.

Can you remember a moment when you were particularly happy?
I can remember the day when I first took my children to my village. My mother and my brother and sisters were very happy that we came to visit. Everybody from the village came to our house to see me and my children. There I'd been for seventeen years with no children and all of a sudden I had eleven children, including a baby. They were all happy and smiled at me. You should have heard the driver who took us there! He told our first village director that he had been to my village with me and that it was as if he had been in a foreign country that was full of harmony.

How would you describe your job to an outsider?
Anybody who doesn't know anything about SOS Children's Villages thinks that an SOS mother works like any other care person in an orphanage. Some people think that the work is very easy. That's why I like to explain what the SOS Children's Village is all about. Each of us has to take care of ten or eleven children of all different ages. I go to the market every day and look after each child as if I were a real mother. Now people from outside can understand our work better and even admire us for it. They say, "You are amazing. You have a large family with lots of children and even have to look after the babies. That's hard work."

Do's Story:
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All these mother's stories come from SOS Children's Village Hermann Gmeiner Academy. Copyright is reserved and no unauthorized use permitted. Use for non-commercial purposes may be requested. The interviews telling about the lives of some SOS Mothers form part of an interesting study on being a replacement Mother to children in need in SOS Children's communities worldwide.